The City of Austin is home to some of the highest property taxes in Texas, has amassed more than $9.3 billion in total debt, and has become so unaffordable that long-time residents “can’t afford to live here anymore.” So it should be no surprise then that the city is preparing to help struggling Austinites by cutting taxes paying off debt reducing regulations hiring a Chief Equity Officer…

That’s right, the city plans to better its residents lives by hiring an executive-level bureaucrat to “facilitat[e] dialogue and organizational practices that support the development and adoption of equity as a shared value.” The new CEO will also play a pivotal role in “addressing equity as it is applied to city wide policies, programs, practices and budget decisions.”

The person to ensure equity’s advancement hasn’t been located yet, but tax-and-traffic weary Austinites got to meet 3 finalists for the position last night where they could compare the actual candidates with the ideal who, according to the job description, has:

Ideal Candidate Qualities

  • “A passion for advancing equity and social justice solutions;”
  • “A demonstrated commitment to community building and engagement;”
  • “An understanding of systemic and institutional racial bias;”

Once city manager Marc Ott makes his final decision on the right person—which is expected to happen within the next month or so—Austin taxpayers will fork over “$183,000 in funding” to get him or her going in the first year. After that, the sky’s the limit.

Perhaps once the city has hired its Chief Equity Officer it can get started on finding a Chief Efficiency Officer to close bogus programs, eliminate waste, and budget smartly using zero-based budgeting.